Here we are. The beginning of this lil thang: The Massamen.
What is this newsletter? Primarily, this is our (Patel and Seabright btw) way of chronicling our exploits. Second, an excuse for us to try new restaurants under the guise of ‘research’.
We started our culinary journey at the ripe old age of 19 when we had our first “Asian day out”. And we’ve been religious about furthering our edification in food ever since.
This will be no Michelin guide - any dropping of cutlery is usually entirely unintentional and a result of excessive consumption of wine.
But we hope you enjoy it. If you do and you know someone whose life would be better by receiving this newsletter, feel free to forward this on, and they can subscribe here 👇
Today, we’re taking it back to where it all started and curating the perfect Asian day out.
11AM - Din Tai Fung
Rating: 🥟x7
Price: £££
Address: 5 Henrietta St, Covent Garden, London WC2E 8PT
You’re bleary-eyed. You’ve just seen the remnants of last night’s rosé hit the pavement. It’s brunch time.
Get to Din Tai Fung early to beat the crowds. If you’re coming in the evening, expect to queue.
You’re here for the XiaoLongBao (soup dumplings) - don’t piss about with the other dishes. These are the main event.
This famous Taiwanese chain is probably a bit more pricey than it should be but the dumplings are delicious.
It does feel like a chain in there, so don’t go for a special occasion. But it’s great for a tasty, casual meal. If you’re in Covent Garden. Which you probably won’t be.
Our tips:
Pork XiaoLongBao.
Shrimp & Kurobuta Pork Shao Mai.
Chicken Wontons with Spicy Sauce.
1PM - KOYA
Rating: 🐷x8
Price: ££
Address: 50 Frith St, Soho, London W1D 4SQ
This place is the absolute bollocks. Which is why we keep going back.
Expect to queue for a little while, but you’ll be rewarded with the best udon in London.
We’ve just had a debate about whether they have proper tables, or just bar seating. Either way, it’s great to watch them make the noodles so sit at the bar.
There’s not a huge menu so our favourites are:
Buta Miso Hiya-Atsu (Pork Miso, Cold Udon with Hot Broth). Unbelievable.
Hiyashi Kinoko (Marintated mushrooms and shiso).
Kernel beers. For the lads.
You’re two meals deep. Now for lunch. Off to She Bu.
3PM - Tian Fu
Rating: 🥜x8.5
Price: ££
Address: 39 Bulwer St, Shepherd's Bush, London W12 8AR
This place is best known for Sezchuan hot-pot but we’ve never had that there. It’s completely delicious and well worth a visit.
This place is where to go for a genuine feast - so don’t waste the opportunity and order large. Go big. Crawl home.
We actually don’t recommend drinking here - you’re probably already on your way and you need the stomach space. Tap water and tea, sis.
We’d get:
Fish Fragrant Aubergines.
Morning Glory (oi oi).
Frogs’ Legs.
Gong Bao Chicken with Peanuts.
It’s about 4:30/5pm now, so don’t feel any shame in picking up a canned slimline G&T from Sainsbury’s next door for your journey back central. You deserve it.
6PM - The Jackalope / Liu Xiaomian
Rating: 🌶x7.5
Price: £
Address: 43 Weymouth Mews, Marylebone, London W1G 7EQ
This is their cover photo on Facebook. Just so you get an idea of what you’re getting yourself in for.
Numbing on the way in. Anything but on the way out.
Delicious Chongqing noodles for a very good price.
They have vegan options of everything! But who wants those.
Our recs:
Hot & Sour Glass Noodle (the best of the bunch).
Spicy Xiaomian (the OG).
Numbing Pork Wonton (to share!).
They have a lovely house white upstairs. We think it was Pinot but we can’t remember.
8:30PM - Farang
Rating: 🇹🇭x8.5
Price: ££££
Address: 72 Highbury Park, Highbury East, London N5 2XE
This is a special treat for when you’ve been good. For when you pass exams. Or get negative STI results.
Originally a pop-up, Farang is probably the best Thai-inspired food in London. The menu has changed a few times but we’ve never not enjoyed a dish there.
Despite the fact that it’s a complete sweat box in summer, it remains one of our all-time favourite restaurants in London.
What to get:
Gai prik.
Whole crispy seabass.
Yellow curry.
Jungle Curry.
Roti.
They used to have this mega dish - chicken and minced prawn. We wish they’d bring it back.
So there we go - how to spend a month’s salary in a day. We very much enjoyed writing this newsletter (over a beautiful £7 bottle of Gavi from Tesco Express). We hope you enjoyed reading it.
See you next month,
The Massamen.